P4+DPerez

A. Thesis statement and essay unity.

Yes, because it wraps everything i have stated in the essay. It reminds the reader of what the essay was about but makes it more understandable.
 * //While transferring a hardy but nonindigenous species to another country, the government would need to consider alot of things that might change the ecology of that country. That nonindigenous plants or animals could carry with it unnoticed viruses or insects. That government might have thought or wanted the nonindigenous plant or animal to have a positive affect on the country, but might have everything backfire and destroy the ecology. On a positive term the nonindeginous species might contribute positively to the ecology or status of that country.//**
 * 1) Does the thesis statement I have written at the end of the essay really express the main point that I make in the essay?

Yes, it reflects in the essay constantly and the essay developes around the thesis statement. The essay supports the thesis statement making the point more obvious of the essay.
 * 1) Does the thesis statement reflect everything in the essay? Does the essay develop everything in the thesis statement?

The thesis statement makes more of a negative statement because it mostly mentions the negative effects on the ecology, although it mentions one good effect.
 * 1) Does the thesis statement make a positive statement rather than a negative one?

yes it does give an argument worth discussing, it argues that although plant importation might affect the ecology it also might help the nutrtion of some poor people.
 * 1) Does your thesis posit an argument that is actually worth arguing? What is that argument?
 * 1) Is every clause in the thesis statement in the active voice? ([|TS 6]) (List the subjects and verbs of each clause in your thesis statement below to illustrate your answer.)

Yes it does satisfy the doubting reader because within it are some information that the reader might use.
 * 1) Does your thesis statement answer the questions "why?" and "how?" to the satisfaction of a doubting reader? Your thesis statement, of course, will not support or explain or provide evidence of why or how, but it should state the reasons why it is true if these will be discussed in the essay.

The thesis statement is clear, precise, informative, and defensible.
 * 1) Is your thesis statement clear precise and limited, controversial or informative , and defensible ?

B. Introduction and conclusion.

INTRODUCTION: While transferring a hardy but nonindigenous species to another country, the government would need to consider alot of things that might change the ecology of that country. That nonindigenous plants or animals could carry with it unnoticed viruses or insects. That government might have thought or wanted the nonindigenous plant or animal to have a positive affect on the country, but might have everything backfire and destroy the ecology. On a positive term the nonindigenous species might contribute positively to the ecology or status of that country. while these variables might affect the decision of the government, they also have to learn and see what other countries have done too. CONCLUSION: The government of the country that wants to import a plant or animal should see the positive and negative effects that it might have on the ecology of the country throughout the time after and before the plant or animal is imported.Some of the importations are nonintentional and thus they have no control over them, but the ones they can control should be evaluated properly.

The first paragraph is not that interesting but it is concrete and has some material that might catch the readers attention.
 * 1) Is your first paragraph interesting? Does it provide concrete and specific material that is likely to catch the reader’s attention and focus it on your topic?

No I dont make contract with the reader.
 * 1) Do you make a clear contract with the reader? Please summarize what you believe your contract is.

No, because it mostly summarizes things the reader already knows.
 * 1) Does the conclusion of your essay satisfy your contract with the reader? How? (2d)

C. Body

TOPIC SENTENCES: -A U. S citizen traveling around the world or to a certain place might bring back, with him or her, accidentaly an insect or virus that could destroy acres of trees. - Although a country might have wanted to help the ecology of its country, and indtroduce a foreign animal, might backfire and destroy the ecology it wanted to help. - While importing plants and animlas might have their draw backs, they also have a positive effect.

BEST PARAGRAPH: Although a country might have wanted to help the ecology of its country and introduce a foreign animal it could back fire and destroy the ecology it wanted to hlp. In Source F (Spotts), in 1935 when two types of beetles where chewing throught Queensland's sugar-cane fields, then growers of the fields got the idea that importing Cane toads might stop the beetles. The Cane toads eat everything they see because they sont have a specific diet to adhere to, and that's what they did- eat everyhting they saw; birds, insects, eggs. Everything, while their poison kills their predators and they multiply and spread across the country. suddenly, theirs an epedemic in Australia and their ecology was greatly destroyed. even when people want to do good, their is a possibility that it might not come out like they expected and backfired.

WORST PARAGRAPH: A U.S citizen traveling around the world or to a certain place might bring back, with him or her, accidentaly and insect or virus that could destroy acres of trees. In Source A, the photograph demonstrates what an accidentatly imported insect called balsam woolly adelgids could or can do to the balsam fir trees. This accidentatly imported insect has disrupted the ecology of that area, killing the food of thousands of animals that feed of that tree. In Source B(Dybas) the SARS viral respitory illness could have reached the U.S by many ways, not just humans but by planes, trains, ships, or cars, making it difficult to know by what means it spread.

The paragraphs move in a logical way, stating first why they shouldnt import nonindeginous plants or animals.
 * 1) Do the paragraphs of your essay move in a logical direction? Does the reader have the experience of getting someplace, of answering questions and moving toward a point? Or does the essay jump around for no apparent reason?

The weakest transition is between the fourth and last paragraph. the strongest was between the second and third paragraph.
 * 1) Evaluate the overall organization of your essay briefly, and then point out where you think the transition between paragraphs is strongest and where it is weakest?

I dont think my essay would be persuasive to people that had doubts about the thesis because i just state facts. I could make the essay interesting by adding to the fourth paragraph a story.
 * 1) Would your essay be persuasive to someone who doubts your thesis statement? What qualities of evidence or support would make it so? ([|DIH 2.4]) In particular, list your specific examples and clear, vivid cases that illustrate and support your points. Do you write about actual people in the essay? Where could you make the essay more interesting by adding a story, and example, or a more specific explanation? Are there places where you should introduce a source more clearly or fully or where a citation needs to be provided and corrected?


 * 1) In the essay, do you answer the question "How do you know?" of every claim you make in such a way that a doubting reader would be satisfied? Evaluate the overall quality of the evidence you use in the essay, then comment on where you think your evidence is strongest and where you think it is weakest. ([|DIH 2.4])

Yes the evidence is explained clearly and correctly when cited.([|DIH 2.4], 31a 1 and 3) the most coherent one was the second because you could clearly see the order,the least was the third paragraph because i started to jump around.
 * 1) Is the evidence introduced and explained clearly and cited correctly, when necessary, in accordance with MLA citation and list of works cited format?
 * 1) Does each sentence in each paragraph lead to or from the central point (the topic sentence)? Yes it does lead and support the topic sentence.(2a) What is your most coherent paragraph? What your least?

Every paragraph is fully developed. the best developed one is the conclusion and the worst is the fourth paragraph.
 * 1) Is every paragraph fully developed? (2c) Which are and which aren’t? What is your best developed paragraph and what your worst?

The essay is clearly written and reletively free of grammar and spelling errors to the best of my knowledge.
 * 1) Is this essay clearly written and relatively free of errors in grammar, spelling, and usage? (5d) What are your most frequent errors?

Overall: This essay is in the middle. It wont be interesting to those who like adventure novels or sci-fi novels. It might be interesting to the people who like to read about nature and how it changes. I dont think this essay would be successful at all, because I just summarized information and I didnt believe in the topic I was writting about.
 * 1) How interesting is this essay? To what kinds of readers would it be more interesting? To what kinds of readers less interesting? What parts are most and what least interesting? Are there parts where readers will be bored or confused?
 * 1) How effective an essay do you believe this is. That is, how successful would this essay be a persuading the other members of the class to believe your thesis statement? Why?