P3+RKnapp

A. Thesis statement and essay unity. //**The decisions are normaly made in vain because the country or area has a pest or animal problem, but in many cases the decision to import differenmt species from another country can be a very costly mistake.**// 1. Does the thesis statement I have written at the end of the essay really express the main point that I make in the essay? (TS 2) Yes the thesis statement does match with the thesis at the end of my essay, but i could do i better job in being clearer. 2. Does the thesis statement reflect everything in the essay? Does the essay develop everything in the thesis statement? (TS 3) Yes and no, the thesis does give a very rough outline of the rest of the essay but does leave out some very key points that are discussed in the essay. 3. Does the thesis statement make a positive statement rather than a negative one? (TS 5) Yes the thesis makes a positive statement about the essay that was written. 4. Does your thesis posit an argument that is actually worth arguing? What is that argument? Yes, the argument that is being argued is that the decisons of a small group of people can affect so many. This decison is best not to be rused, even though in many cases it is. 5. Is every clause in the thesis statement in the active voice? (TS 6) (List the subjects and verbs of each clause in your thesis statement below to illustrate your answer.) No, my thesis was not in an active voice. 6. Does your thesis statement answer the questions "why?" and "how?" to the satisfaction of a doubting reader? Your thesis statement, of course, will not support or explain or provide evidence of why or how, but it should state the reasons why it is true if these will be discussed in the essay. (TS 4) Yes it does answer the questions "why?" and "how?", it does this bay stating why these decisons are being made and how it could affect people. 7. Is your thesis statement clear (TS 7), precise and limited (TS 8), controversial or informative (TS 9), and defensible (TS 10)? Yes, but i needs to be worked on because the reader could be confussed. No, it is not precise and limited, it rambles on and leaves the reader slightly confussed. No my thesis is not comtroversial, but it is informative. Yes it is defensible because it is supporting my ideas. B. Introduction and conclusion. 1. Is your first paragraph interesting? Does it provide concrete and specific material that is likely to catch the reader’s attention and focus it on your topic? (2d) My first paragraph is not as interesting as it could be. Although it does provide concrete and specific materials that will intest the reader. 2. Do you make a clear contract with the reader? Please summarize what you believe your contract is.
 * Introduction**: When a buisness or a government agency want s to import a non native species they have many things to consider. With the import of thses new species there are great consiquences that come with these decisions. The decisions are normaly made in vain because the country or area has a pest or animal problem, but in many cases the decision to import differenmt species from another country can be a very costly mistake.
 * Conclusion**: Sorce A shows the distruction that these peskey hitchhikers cause when they are unleashed on new taritory. So before making the decision to import forigen species inot their own country they must do extensive reserch. The governments of all country's are allready under massive amounts of pressure so the last thing they need is their country to be over run with cane toads.

3. Does the conclusion of your essay satisfy your contract with the reader? How?

C. Body

(Please copy your topic sentences and your best and worst paragraphs here, labeling each.) 1. Do the paragraphs of your essay move in a logical direction? Does the reader have the experience of getting someplace, of answering questions and moving toward a point? Or does the essay jump around for no apparent reason? Evaluate the overall organization of your essay briefly, and then point out where you think the transition between paragraphs is strongest and where it is weake? Yes my paragraphs move in a logical direction. No, I could do a better job at answering the thesis argument. My essay is very porrly put together and does not have enough flow. 2. Evaluate the overall organization of your essay briefly, and then point out where you think the transition between paragraphs is strongest and where it is weakest? There is not enough orginization of the essay. It is slopply put together and does not stay on topic or on point. 3. Would your essay be persuasive to someone who doubts your thesis statement? What qualities of evidence or support would make it so? (DIH 2.4) In particular, list your specific examples and clear, vivid cases that illustrate and support your points. Do you write about actual people in the essay? Where could you make the essay more interesting by adding a story, and example, or a more specific explanation? Are there places where you should introduce a source more clearly or fully or where a citation needs to be provided and corrected? No, the thesis has to draw the reader in at the beging otherwise they will be uninterested when they read the body paragraphs. 4. In the essay, do you answer the question "How do you know?" of every claim you make in such a way that a doubting reader would be satisfied? Evaluate the overall quality of the evidence you use in the essay, then comment on where you think your evidence is strongest and where you think it is weakest. (DIH 2.4) No, in my essay i do not answer the question "How do you know?" 5. Is the evidence introduced and explained clearly and cited correctly, when necessary, in accordance with MLA citation and list of works cited format? (DIH 2.4, 31a 1 and 3) Yes, when i pulled information from the different sorces i put it in MLA citation. 6. Does each sentence in each paragraph lead to or from the central point (the topic sentence)? (2a) What is your most coherent paragraph? What your least? No, each sentence in each paragraph does not lead to more information about the centarl point. The first paragraph is the the one will the most coherent. 7. Is every paragraph fully developed? (2c) Which are and which aren’t? What is your best developed paragraph and what your worst? They are both developed but not to the best of their abilities. They are both about equal. 8. Is this essay clearly written and relatively free of errors in grammar, spelling, and usage? (5d) What are your most frequent errors? No the essay is not clearly written, but is relatively free of errors and spelling errors.
 * Best:** Before a buisness or a government agency dicides to import a species from another country they should learn from the mistakes of others. For example in 1935 Australia imported Cane toads in hope of reducing two types of beatles thats were whewing hrough Queensland's sugar-cane fileds. Thins looked to be a good idea on paper but when the Cane Toads arriveed their problems only grew. The Cane toads, instead of consentrating on the geattles they ate everything else insight: insects, bird eggs and even pet food. Becaus they are also posinous they killed their predidtors, which included house pets. These toads spread across the entire continent of AUstralia like wild fire (source F).
 * Worst:** Another important factor the buisness or government agency should consider is that when a different species of plants or animals are inported they bring along unexpected guests, hitchhikers. When these hitchhikers arive at their new home there is no telling what havock they could reak on a nation. These hitchhikers, "ride in the ballats takds or aboard the hulls of ships,... containers, or mingles with grain, fruits, vegtables, cut glowers, timber, minerals, soils and the other goods brought, sold and shipped world wide."(Source E)

Overall:

How interesting is this essay? To what kinds of readers would it be more interesting? To what kinds of readers less interesting? What parts are most and what least interesting? Are there parts where readers will be bored or confused? How effective an essay do you believe this is. That is, how successful would this essay be a persuading the other members of the class to believe your thesis statement? Why? This essay over all is some what interesting. This essay would be more intersting to a reader who is less informed on the subject. This essay would be less interesting if the person allready had a good idea of the affects of forigen species has on a different place. The essay was not very sucsessfull because it does not ever develope into something past the basics.